Elodie 5.5 – 6 years old: eating well, even lots of new foods in China

Pancreatic cancer
We didn’t go anywhere this summer holiday because my mother was having pancreatic cancer. She was hospitalised a few times, and she was getting more tired. Then we heard that she had to stop treatment because it was not working anymore. This absolutely broke my heart. My mother would try to put up a brave face whenever she could. But she was afraid of dying and was depressed about that.

Though my relationship with my mother was not always easy, I was not prepared to live without my mum. All my grandparents lived well into their eighties or nineties. During the last years I was in therapy for all we have been through with Elodie’s eating disorder and the anticipatory grief was thoroughly discussed as well. I feel this helped me cope with the situation.

My mother’s passing
I had a 5-week leave during the school summer holiday so we could spend as much time with my mother as possible. During the day, my mother was sleeping, so I did something fun with Elodie, and in the afternoon we went to my parent’s place. Elodie’s bedtime was later, and we got to have some quality time. Then, 4 weeks in, suddenly my mom declined, and she became unresponsive. Within a week, she was gone.

Elodie was incredibly sad that suddenly grandma was gone. We got Elodie a pluche which looks like a cartoon version of her grandma, with voice memos. Honestly, this is lovely, and it soothes both of us.

The entire situation didn’t impact her eating. And luckily, her eating was much better than before. Taking care of a sick mother and worrying about Elodie’s eating would be too much to bear.

When we were at my parents’ place, my dad would make her chicken soup and rice, she would mix it together and could eat 2 bowls. She ate fried shrimps, and other Chinese dishes.

Sick
Elodie had a throat infection and the flu, but she would still continue eating, and even asked for it, saying she was hungry. She only lost 0.5 kg in a week, whereas in the past she would lose at least 1 kg. Her immune system is better too, she could go to school with a painkiller.

She continues to show eating improvement, especially at home after school. Sometimes she eats so much that I am afraid she will rupture her stomach! For instance, two bowls of chicken soup with rice in one sitting. She can clearly indicate what she wants to eat. And if we don’t have it, she will mention other things she likes to eat instead. We don’t have to stress about always having the right foods in our house. In the past, my husband would rush to the supermarket to get what she wanted to eat.

Speech therapist
Elodie has been seeing a speech therapist again because she was stuttering a bit. With their guidance, it has been reduced a lot. She has quite an overbite, and she uses her molars to bite off food. I wonder if that also added to her eating disorder. I can imagine that it does not make eating easier.

Physical therapy
Elodie was running much slower when compared to her peers, and her other skills were lacking. So we went to see a physical therapist, and she will be getting therapy weekly. She was on the P5 for most skills and had low muscle pressure. I am wondering whether this has contributed to the eating disorder as well.

When she was a few months old baby, she couldn’t hold up her neck and had to get therapy too. To me, it makes sense.

Also, she is a lazy speaker, according to the speech therapist. I wonder whether that is due to the loss of muscle pressure as well.

Dentist
We went to a specialised dentist to check her overbite. And they said she should come back when she was about 9 or 10 years old to get braces. The speech therapist was hoping she would get some help now to improve her speech. But I am happy we don’t have to bother her because she is eating so well, and truly enjoying it.

Hong Kong
We had to go to Hong Kong for family stuff by the end of the year. I was not too worried about her eating there, because she likes Dim sum, noodles and fried rice.

It was an 11-hour flight, and it was a short night of sleep on the plane. But Elodie was eating wonderfully, she ate lots of sushi on the train and at the airport, and on the flight, she finished her children’s menu with fries and meatballs. Then continued with my pasta arabiata and ate two-thirds of it, a bit later she finished a cup of instant noodles. And she wanted more noodles! I told her to go to sleep instead of eating anymore.

She did quite well, she tried many new things, like octopus tentacles, fried rice with eel, and desserts. In Hong Kong she especially liked the churros. When we went to supermarkets, she would actively seek out foods that she would like to try. It’s still amazing.

Disney
We went to Disneyland Hong Kong, and I expected her to choose fun over eating, and I was right. I had medical nutrition with me, just in case. She was too busy with all the fun rides and the beautiful surroundings and didn’t want to eat. I gave her the option of medical nutrition or food, and she chose the easy way: medical nutrition.

For dinner, she wanted to have medical nutrition to not waste time having fun, but we wanted to eat properly and have a rest. So we ate there and she ate fries and other foods too.

This showed us that exploring the world was a main priority. Just like when she was a little child. Not sure if that is the case with normal eating kids as well.

She loved Disney, it was magical, we had so much fun in the Frozen area. Hong Kong Disney was the first to have the Frozen land available. We did the Frozen ride three times. The things you do for your children. 🙂

Zhongshan
After Hong Kong, we went to Zhongshan. Here, the food is less international, but Elodie was eating much better here. I didn’t expect that. She loved Korean BBQ, the scrambled eggs, meat, melted cheese and ice sandwich. She wanted to go there every day.

We went to visit family as well, and they had typical Chinese food. Elodie didn’t like that, so she ate some of the instant noodles that I took with me. She was more interested in playing with the other kids than in eating. Even for me, the food was ‘too’ Chinese, so my appetite was low, and I couldn’t wait to get back to the mall and have some ‘normal’ Chinese food there. I guess I am too Dutch to eat traditional Chinese food.

The biggest difference was that I didn’t get anxious or stressed that she wasn’t eating. She was not getting any medical nutrition on this China trip in the morning because she was eating so well. And I don’t want her to become obese either, I could tell she was becoming a bit ‘chubby’. 4 years ago, Elodie was not eating or drinking, and we were desperate for her to eat something at all. Now I was worrying that she shouldn’t become too chubby… Can you imagine?

Throughout this holiday, it was great to see that her weight was stable, and she was fully eating on her own. She is a normal kid who likes to play with other children, and we can do regular activities and outings like other parents without having to worry about her eating.

At exactly 6 years old, she is 21 kg and 119cm. So, super average weight, and taller than other kids. Many people can’t even tell she has/had an eating disorder.